“Every moment is the paradox of now or never.” â Simon Van Booy
The atmosphere of her house was bright in that dark night. Her friends were grooving with the music. She was not looking her best in that skater dress of dull Olive color with flat sandals. It’s not that she didn’t have the town’s best collection but still she chose to wear that on her birthday what she could in any of her normal days. “Let’s dance now. It’s been almost an hour that we are standing here in balcony. All are enjoying in there except us”, a girl standing beside him beckoned him.
He is was the birthday girl’s boyfriend.
They broke up recently with the mutual consent. She had invited him to the party for he was a family friend first and then her partner.
“I cannot go. It’s her birthday. We broke up just a few weeks back and today here I am, standing in her house, attending her birthday party.”
He pointed to the inside where everybody was dancing,” All this. This just doesn’t make any sense.” “It’s impossible for me to stand here and watch her dancing as if nothing ever happened. As if it is just me who went through this break up. How can she do this to me?” He said and turned towards the railing of balcony, and so did the girl beside him. The house was on thirteenth floor, at some real good height.
“What if somebody falls off this height?” A thought ran across his mind. “What if?”
Turmoil of emotions was wrecking him down. He couldn’t believe that they were really over. He was broken inside but at the same time was full of vengeance too. That low times’ vengeance when you blame everybody and everything around you for your situation which actually does noting right, but helps in worsening the things. He turned back, entered the living room and then exited the house, without telling anything to anybody.
But from the corner of her eye, the birthday girl did notice him leaving. What neither of them noticed or realized was that he had forgotten his phone at her place.
After a long session of dancing, everybody found a place to relax themselves.
“He didn’t even wish me, let alone look at me. This whole time he was standing with that girl, who has a crush on him since his childhood, in the balcony, that too facing the side where he cannot see me. He didn’t seem to care a bit. Was it just me who was into that relationship for all those years?”
She finally opened up about her emotions to her friend. At last she could take off her happy mask, which she had been flaunting since evening, and be the real self. She never wanted to break up at the first place. But shit happens and it did happen which forced them to take that step. All she wanted was to just confront his feelings, that if she really even mattered to him, ever. So she decided to text him, asking for answers. Calling him wasn’t an option for her with her parents around.
When she didn’t receive any reply, even after half an hour, she took the keys of her bike and moved out of her house, stealthily. Before starting her bike she gave him a few futile calls, which for obvious reasons he couldn’t answer. She started her bike and left for his house. Sky which was clear two hours ago got bored of its placidity, and turned its venturesome side on. Soon it started thundering.
She was just a minute away from his place when a Honda City hit her bike hard from behind. The drunkards in the car didn’t even bother to stop and disappeared in the heavy rain which had just started. She tried to crawl towards her bike but it all went in vain; she couldn’t move anything except her left arm, that too to a very little extent. Helplessness, pain and mental anguish brought tears into her eyes amid strong splatter of rains. She wanted to shout aloud for help but she was too weak to even keep her eyes open.
“Please help me to reach his house. I need to tell him that I still love him. Please help me.”
Even throughout this excruciating pain when she was fighting for her life, she kept on mumbling these sentences. She, soaked in rain water, with her bike kept on lying there for sometime when a car passing by noticed her. The owner of the car called an ambulance. By the time ambulance arrived, she had already lost a lot of blood, but her heart was still beating. There was still hope for her.
“I need to talk to her. I am sure she loved me back with the same passion as I did, as I do. But what if she didn't?” He looked down the cliff edge he was standing at. "I should jump". His thought pushed him, but a voice, familiar to him, pulled him back. He turned back to see her in that same Olive dress. She was standing there, but was looking too weak. Seeing her there, he started moving towards her. He had just started moving when she turned around and went behind the trunk of a huge tree.
He hurried towards the tree but couldn't find anybody there. It was as if she had just vanished and got dissolved in the mighty night’s darkness. He called out her name aloud many a times; he even rushed all around to catch a glimpse of her but failed. Mentally he was too tired and conflicted to comprehend what just happened. Maybe it was just his wishful thinking playing tricks on his overworked mind. "I should call her or else I will go mad."
After sliding his hand within his pocket, he learned that he had forgotten his phone at her house. Completely wet he reached at her place just to find it empty, strangely. But the stranger thing that happened at the cliff still reeled his mind. He tried to shrug it off and picked up his phone lying on the top of the fridge; he checked out the messages. I loved you with all my heart only to find that you didn’t love me that way. Is it? An ear to ear smile appeared on his face after learning that it was not the end after all, that she also loved him the way he did. He tried calling her number which was out of reach. He texted her back with a reply to her question, A very happy birthday to the girl I love. Call me as soon as you see my text. He waited at her house for it was still raining heavily outside. After a few minutes, he jumped off the sofa with a big smile seeing her name beeping on his phone. He picked up the call, which was not from her but one of her friends, only to know something which tore him apart.
The girl on the phone informed him of that terrible accident which took place near his home and added- "If only the ambulance could have arrived little earlier, she might have been able to hold enough blood in her system to sustain herself for little longer, and she would have survived." He did realize that she was headed towards his house.
Those numerous missed calls and that message. "She lost her life because of me. If only I had talked to her during the party, she wouldn’t have rushed to my place. I couldn't even tell her that I love her. " He cursed himself and broke down into tears, endless tears of grief and regret. P.S. - Not everyone is lucky enough to get a second chance. So say it when you can, do it when you can. Nobody knows if you will have your next moment, let alone the next day.
There is nothing like a ‘Perfect’ moment.
There always is a moment, only you can make it ‘Perfect’. Don’t let your life’s wand decide for you, rather become the master of that wand.